May 01, 2002

In solidarity with the recent statement by Jamie Kellner, Chairman and CEO of Turner Broadcasting System, that TV viewers have a "contract with the network" and when they "skip a commercial...[they're]...actually stealing the programming" and The Dallas Morning News' current battles against deep-linking, the executive management of Illuminated Donkey Media has instituted some changes to the implied contract between The Donk and you, our loyal readers:It may seem complicated, but by following the above simple rules you can avoid becoming the scum-sucking content thieves you so desperately long to be.

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