The Illuminated Donkey

Trapped, trapped like a rat! After a fine Manhattan evening spent drinking tequila and listening to Neil Sedaka (along with an audience who simply could not clap at all), I woke up this morning to the sound of my toilet...gurgling, really. That remarkable Jersey City infrastructure was working its magic, directing the excess rainfall to seek an escape route through my bathroom. I then spent a good half-hour trying to escape the completely gridlocked four-block radius surrounding my apartment, finally giving up and inching back here until things clear. Oh well, perhaps I'll register a complaint at the City Council meeting tonight, part of my continuing effort to become a better citizen of this fine city that some call Chilltown.

And with a nod to oceanographer and fellow yesterday-birthday-haver Gabe Vecchi, the National Oceanic & Atmospheric Administration's Guide to Naming Hurricanes, though it doesn't include the hurricane world's biggest honor, the list of retired Atlantic hurricane names, which happens when a hurricane does a huge stinking pile of damage.

Okay, let's try going to work again.