January 28, 2004
From: Guy Sterling IV, EVP Marketing
Re: Marketing/Distribution Plan for Independent Feature: "AshleyHotSex.wmv"
Ashley: Received the final cut of "AshleyHotSex" and we're all incredibly thrilled with it. It definitely avoids the grainy, disjointed quality that we were worried about, and it's a terrific showcase for a breakthrough performance. I'm sure we won't be hearing any more talk about any "wooden performances" or "lack of emotion" after they see the bit with the nightstand and the candles. And be sure to pass along to Jake how much I liked his cinematography/co-starring, and mention that bananas can help prevent leg cramps.
Now, there is a legitimate worry that the whole category may be growing too crowded — I mean, Dr. J for crissakes — so I suggest we move quickly. I've already taken the liberty of initiating several lawsuits and pre-issuing our angry denials. In addition, we set up four press meetings for next week and then immediately canceled them citing your emotional precariousness and a refusal to discuss "AshleyHotSex," which prompted a new round of interviews and at least two calls from the major networks. We'll discuss on a case-by-case basis on Friday morning.
Now, w/r/t your short-term actions, we've found that a three-day no-comment/denial cycle usually works the best: two days and you seem a little eager, four and you look a little delusional. In fact, we might even cut that denial time since Jake was good enough to mention your website address twice (though in the future, while the framed posters from your last film may have seemed like a good idea — and of course I loved you as Dancer's Friend in "Talk to the Hand" — we should probably avoid giving free publicity to past projects that you don't get points from, though I imagine that won't be an ongoing concern.
As for the distribution strategy, I've just sent the file to my 15-year-old nephew with the Subject Line "I CAN'T BELIEVE ITS REALLY HER!!!!!!" It should be forwarded to everybody else in the world's Inbox in about 45 minutes. Watch for it. We'll see you on Friday.
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