The Illuminated Donkey

[Fine, it's a theme week — now go eff yerself.] Dear Rahway Chowder Pot Waitress: Either you were having difficulty handling that huge lunchtime rush (three whole tables!) or you're just a freaking idiot: those are the only two possible explanation for what happened today at lunch. I had to stop at CVS before eating, so I made sure that before I even sat down I gave you my order and let you know that I was a bit short on time today. You head into the kitchen while I go up to the soup-and-salad bar, get some chowder and some salad, and sit down to eat. So it's 20 minutes later, I've finished everything and am reading the paper when you come up to the table and ask..."So, do you want me to put your order in now?" Well, no, why the hell would I want you to do a crazy thing like that? After all, I get a three-hour lunch and anyway I figured the order would just magically float into the kitchen all by itself! Here, sugarbeets: you sit down and I'll put in my own goddamned order...deek!