The Illuminated Donkey

In case any of you wanted to learn a little more about my appearance and demeanor — the Ken behind the charming Donk persona, as it were — Mike Whybark describes me in somewhat disturbing and disconcerting detail in his latest MW of the Week. I can take issue with several facts, but I'd rather just let the mystery of the real me grow. Still, I have to think that any testimonial that compares me to Wallace, Steve Buscemi in Ghost World, and George Costanza ain't gonna help me in gettin' the ladies.