The Illuminated Donkey

What do Keith Moreland, Glenn Davis, Luis Polonia, Rocky Coppinger and Matt Nokes have in common? They're all illustrious members of Baltimore City Paper's All-Time All-Useless Orioles Team.

This is about the players who got their cup of coffee, spilled it all over the manager's crotch, and went back for refills--players whose failures were profound and significant. The list encompasses a range of types: broken-down has-beens, no-talent journeymen, eternally unripe prospects, flashes-in-the-pan who outstayed their welcome. Some were bad everywhere they played; some were bad only in Baltimore. Many of their performances testify to organizational stupidity; a few testify only to the perversity of fate. What they have in common is that the Orioles invested resources, hope, and/or playing time in them -- and got burned.

Go check it out, and then write one for your own team.